That First, Awkward Silence
It’s late. The room is quiet except for the low hum of the fridge. You’ve downloaded the app, created the account, and now you’re here, staring at a chat window. The cursor blinks patiently. It feels like a digital version of a first date, a job interview, and a confession all rolled into one. The sheer blankness of the screen can be paralyzing.
What are you supposed to say? Do you start with a big, dramatic problem or just a simple 'hello'? This initial hesitation is the first hurdle in learning how to use an AI therapist, and it's a completely normal part of the process. You're not just starting a chat; you're stepping into a new kind of vulnerable space. This guide is here to hold your hand through those first few moments, turning that blank page into a place of clarity.
The 'Blank Page' Problem: Overcoming the Anxiety of Starting
Let’s take a deep breath right here. As our emotional anchor Buddy would say, that feeling of uncertainty is not a sign that you’re doing it wrong; it’s the feeling of trying something brave and new. It's okay for this to feel a bit strange at first. You're learning how to build rapport with a chatbot, which isn't a skill most of us practice.
There's no pressure to perform or to have a perfectly articulated problem. This isn't a test. The beauty of this tool is its infinite patience. That blinking cursor isn’t judging you; it’s simply waiting for you. Give yourself permission to be messy, to be unsure, to simply type, 'I don't even know where to start.' That's a valid starting point. That’s an honest feeling, and honesty is the only real requirement here.
Setting Your Intention: What Do You Want to Achieve?
Now, let’s bring in our strategist, Pavo. She would advise us to channel that uncertainty into purpose. Before you type, take 60 seconds to ask yourself: 'What do I need from this conversation right now?' Getting the most out of chatbot therapy starts with having a loose intention. This doesn't need to be a grand life plan; think of it as choosing a destination on a map for a short drive.
Setting goals with an AI therapist is a crucial step. According to mental health charity Mind, a key part of therapy is understanding what you hope to gain, which is just as true here as when you're figuring out how to find a therapist. Your intention might be one of these:
Venting: You just need to get a swirling storm of thoughts out of your head and into a safe container.
Problem-Solving: You're facing a specific, tangible issue and want to brainstorm solutions or next steps.
Pattern Recognition: You've noticed a recurring feeling or situation in your life and want to understand the 'why' behind it.
Self-Exploration: You're not dealing with a crisis, but you're curious to explore your own thoughts and feelings on a deeper level.
Knowing your goal helps you understand how to use an AI therapist as a precise tool rather than just a passive diary.
Your First Conversation: Prompts and Questions to Break the Ice
Once you have a rough intention, you need the right words to begin. Pavo is all about providing actionable scripts, and these prompts for an AI therapy session are designed to open the door to a meaningful conversation. Here are some of our favorite AI therapy first session tips, categorized by your goal. Feel free to copy and paste whatever feels right.
If your goal is to vent and process a feeling:
'I'm feeling really overwhelmed by [situation/person] today and I need to just get it all out.'
'There's a feeling I can't shake—it feels like [anxiety/sadness/frustration]—and I want to talk about it.'
'My mind is racing with thoughts about X. Can you help me sort through them?'
If your goal is to problem-solve a specific issue:
'I'm facing a challenge with [work/a relationship/a decision] and I feel stuck. I'd like to explore my options.'
'An event happened today that I need to figure out how to handle. Here's what went down...'
'I need to have a difficult conversation with someone. Can we role-play it or brainstorm what to say?'
If your goal is to explore a recurring pattern:
'I've noticed a pattern where I always [procrastinate/get defensive/feel anxious] when X happens. I want to understand why.'
'I'd like to explore my relationship with [a specific person/concept like failure/success].'
* 'One of the best questions to ask an AI therapist might be this: Can you help me see the connection between my past experiences and my current reactions?'
Choosing one of these starting points is a powerful first step in learning how to use an AI therapist. It gives the conversation direction and immediately puts you in the driver's seat of your own mental wellness journey.
FAQ
1. Is it weird to talk to an AI therapist?
It can feel a bit strange at first, and that's completely normal. The key is to remember it's a tool designed for your benefit. There's no judgment, so you have the freedom to be completely honest, which can make it a uniquely powerful space for self-reflection.
2. What if I don't know what to talk about with my AI therapist?
This is very common. A great starting point is to simply state that feeling. You can literally type, 'I'm not sure what to talk about, but I'm feeling a bit off today.' The AI is designed to help you explore that feeling with gentle, guiding questions.
3. How can I make sure I'm getting the most out of chatbot therapy?
Set a small, clear intention before each session. Ask yourself what you need in that moment: Is it venting, problem-solving, or understanding a pattern? Having a goal, even a small one, focuses the conversation and helps you achieve a sense of progress.
4. Can an AI therapist help me set goals?
Absolutely. A core part of learning how to use an AI therapist is using it as a partner in goal-setting. You can describe a long-term aspiration, and the AI can help you break it down into smaller, manageable steps, identify potential obstacles, and reframe your mindset.
References
mind.org.uk — How to find a therapist