The Silent Panic of Being 'Found Out'
It’s the moment before you present in a big meeting. Your slides are perfect, you know the material cold, but there’s a cold dread coiling in your stomach. It’s the whisper that says, ‘Any minute now, they’re going to realize you don’t belong here.’ This feeling has a name, and understanding it is the first step in learning how to deal with imposter syndrome.
This sensation of being a fraud is a pervasive undercurrent for so many high-achievers. We see characters like Kiernan Shipka's Sabrina Spellman on screen, suddenly gifted with immense power and struggling to believe she's worthy of it. That fictional identity crisis mirrors a very real psychological phenomenon—the persistent inability to internalize your accomplishments and a deep-seated fear of being exposed as a 'fraud'.
This isn't a personal failing; it's a cognitive distortion. It’s the gap between your objective success and your subjective feeling of inadequacy. The journey of how to deal with imposter syndrome isn't about becoming more competent; it's about learning to finally believe in the competence you already have.
The 'Any-Minute-Now' Feeling: What Imposter Syndrome Really Is
Let’s take a deep breath together. That heavy feeling you carry, that imposter syndrome anxiety, is not a sign that you are broken or ungrateful. As our emotional anchor Buddy would say, 'That isn't fraudulence; that's the weight of your own high standards sitting on your shoulders.' It’s okay that it feels this real and this scary.
At its core, imposter syndrome is a psychological pattern where you doubt your skills, talents, or accomplishments. Despite external evidence of your competence, you remain convinced that you are a fraud and do not deserve all you've achieved. According to the American Psychological Association, it's an experience that disproportionately affects high-achieving women, creating a cycle of self-doubt.
One of the most insidious signs of imposter syndrome is attributing your success to luck, timing, or deceiving others into thinking you're smarter than you are. It’s a profound sense of intellectual phoniness. Buddy wants you to know that this feeling is a shared human experience, not a verdict on your worth. The first step in figuring out how to deal with imposter syndrome is giving yourself permission to feel it without judgment.
Confronting the Inner Critic: Is That Voice Really Telling the Truth?
Alright, let's get real for a second. Our realist Vix would put it this way: 'That inner critic isn't an oracle; it's an unreliable narrator with a grudge.' It feeds you a story about being a fraud, and you’ve been treating it like gospel. It’s time to fact-check that narrative.
Feeling like a fraud at work is often fueled by cognitive distortions. This is the mental filter that conveniently ignores all your wins and zooms in on one tiny mistake. Vix’s method is what she calls ‘Reality Surgery.’ You need to separate the feeling from the fact. The feeling is, ‘I’m going to be fired.’ The fact is, ‘I just received a positive performance review last month.’
Here’s the move. Create a ‘Fact Sheet.’ On one side, write down the accusation from your inner critic (e.g., ‘I only got this job because I got lucky’). On the other, list every piece of objective evidence that refutes it (e.g., ‘I passed three rounds of interviews,’ ‘My manager praised my Q3 report’). This isn't about positive thinking; it’s about evidence-based thinking. Confronting that voice is a critical part of how to deal with imposter syndrome because it forces the critic to face the data. And the data doesn’t lie.
Building Your 'Brag File': How to Internalize Your Success
Once you’ve reality-checked your inner critic, it’s time for a proactive strategy. As our strategist Pavo advises, 'You can't fight a feeling with a thought; you have to fight a distorted narrative with an overwhelming portfolio of evidence.' This is where you learn how to internalize your accomplishments.
We’re going to build what Pavo calls a ‘Brag File’ or an ‘Evidence Log.’ This is not about ego; it’s about creating a documented, factual counter-narrative to the feeling of being a fraud. It’s a crucial tool for anyone wondering how to deal with imposter syndrome long-term.
Here is the plan:
Step 1: Create a dedicated digital folder or physical file. Label it ‘Evidence of Competence.’ This is your private resource for overcoming self-doubt.
Step 2: Collect everything. Every time you get a positive piece of feedback—an email from a happy client, a note from your boss, a project that went well, a metric you surpassed—screenshot it or save it in this folder. Don't dismiss anything as 'too small.'
Step 3: Schedule a regular review. When the imposter syndrome anxiety starts to creep in, your assignment is to open this file and read it. Not just skim it—read it. This practice is a form of cognitive behavioral therapy for imposter syndrome, rewiring your brain to accept your achievements as real. This is how to deal with imposter syndrome in a structured way.
FAQ
1. What are the main types of imposter syndrome?
Experts often categorize imposter syndrome into five types: The Perfectionist (sets excessively high goals and feels like a failure for any mistake), The Superwoman/Superman (pushes themselves to work harder to cover insecurities), The Natural Genius (believes competence should be easy and struggles if they have to work hard), The Soloist (feels asking for help reveals their phoniness), and The Expert (fears being exposed as inexperienced or unknowledgeable).
2. Can learning how to deal with imposter syndrome help with anxiety?
Absolutely. Imposter syndrome anxiety is very real. The constant fear of being 'found out' can lead to chronic stress, burnout, and generalized anxiety. By addressing the root cognitive distortions of imposter syndrome, you can significantly reduce the anxiety it causes and stop the cycle of over-preparing and self-doubt.
3. Why is imposter syndrome so common in high-achieving women?
While it can affect anyone, it is particularly prevalent among high-achieving women due to a combination of societal pressures, systemic bias, and gendered expectations. Women are often socialized to be modest and may face a finer line between being assertive and being 'aggressive,' leading them to downplay their accomplishments and internalize criticism more readily.
4. What's a quick tip for feeling like a fraud at work?
One immediate action is to reframe your self-talk. Instead of saying 'I don't know what I'm doing,' try 'This is a new challenge, and I am capable of learning.' Focus on facts over feelings. Remind yourself of three concrete things you have successfully accomplished in your role. This shifts your focus from a vague sense of dread to specific, evidence-based competence.
References
apa.org — Feel like a fraud?