Feeling Stuck? The Overwhelming Weight of Your 'In-Between' Phase
It’s that specific kind of quiet that settles in after midnight, when the only light is from your phone screen, illuminating a reality that feels miles away from your dreams. You’re doing the work, you’re showing up, but the goalposts seem to keep moving further away. This is the 'in-between'—a space filled with the silent hum of anxiety and the heavy cloak of what feels like failure.
This feeling isn’t unique to you. It's the same suffocating air an aspiring actor like Brandon Sklenar must have breathed while living out of his car, auditioning for roles that went to someone else. It's the exhaustion of giving your all and hearing nothing back. It’s the creeping whisper of imposter syndrome in creative fields, the one that asks, 'Who are you to even try?'
Our emotional anchor, Buddy, puts it best: 'That feeling of being stuck isn't a sign you're failing; it's a sign you're brave enough to want something more.' Before the breakthrough, there is always the grind. This period of struggle, of overcoming adversity, is not a detour; it's the foundation being laid for what’s to come. The exhaustion you feel is the proof of your effort, and the ache in your heart is the measure of your ambition.
The 'Breakthrough' Myth: It's Not Luck, It's a System
We love the highlight reel. We see an actor like Brandon Sklenar in a hit show like 1923 and instinctively label it 'overnight success.' But this narrative is a dangerous illusion. It dismisses the years of unseen labor, the countless rejections, and the sheer force of will required to persist.
As our sense-maker Cory would observe, success isn't an event; it's the result of a system. The story of Brandon Sklenar's career isn't about a single lucky break. It’s a case study in the psychology of perseverance. True resilience isn't about never falling down; it's about the psychological and emotional skills we build each time we get back up. It’s a process of adapting in the face of adversity, trauma, and significant sources of stress, as defined by experts in the field of psychology in resources like Psychology Today.
This journey is about the power of delayed gratification—choosing the discomfort of the present for the possibility of a better future. Every 'no' he received, every day he chose to stay in the game, was a small investment in his resilience. It wasn't magic; it was a grueling, unglamorous process of building mental fortitude.
Here’s the permission slip from Cory you might need to hear: 'You have permission to stop judging your process by someone else’s final product.' The time you’re spending now in the 'in-between' is where the real work of building resilience from failure happens. It's the most critical phase of your story.
Your 3-Step Plan to Build Unshakeable Resilience
Feeling seen is essential, and understanding the psychology is clarifying. But now, we need a strategy. Our social strategist, Pavo, insists that emotion must be converted into action. If you're wondering how to stay motivated when struggling, you don't need more inspiration—you need a framework.
Here is the move. This isn't about wishing for a breakthrough; it's about building the discipline and structure to create your own.
Step 1: Reframe Your Narrative.
Your inner monologue is either your greatest asset or your heaviest anchor. Stop telling yourself the story of 'I'm failing.' Instead, adopt the narrative of 'I'm training.' Every setback is data. Every rejection is a lesson in persistence. This cognitive shift moves you from a passive victim to an active participant in your own comeback story.
Step 2: Engineer 'Micro-Wins'.
Big goals are overwhelming and can lead to paralysis. The key to overcoming adversity motivation is to break down your ambition into laughably small, achievable tasks. Instead of 'become a successful artist,' your goal for today is 'sketch for 15 minutes' or 'send one email.' These small, consistent actions build momentum and provide the psychological fuel of accomplishment needed to keep going.
Step 3: Conduct a Resource Audit.
Resilience is not a solo sport. Take a pragmatic inventory of your support system. Who are the people who energize you versus the ones who drain you? What activities (a walk, listening to a specific playlist, 5 minutes of meditation) reliably reset your nervous system? Schedule these into your week with the same seriousness you would a business meeting. This is your personal logistics department for mental health.
FAQ
1. What can we learn from Brandon Sklenar's early career struggles?
Brandon Sklenar's story teaches us the profound importance of resilience and the psychology of perseverance. His experience of living in his car while pursuing acting highlights that success is rarely linear and often requires enduring significant hardship and practicing delayed gratification before a breakthrough occurs.
2. How do you build resilience when you feel like giving up?
Building resilience involves several key strategies. First, reframe your internal narrative from one of failure to one of learning and training. Second, focus on small, achievable 'micro-wins' to build momentum. Finally, actively manage your support system and coping mechanisms as a strategic resource for your mental health.
3. Is 'overnight success' a real thing for actors like Brandon Sklenar?
The concept of 'overnight success' is largely a myth. For nearly every successful actor, including Brandon Sklenar, their public breakthrough is preceded by years of unseen hard work, rejection, and persistence. Their success is a product of a long-term system of dedication, not a single lucky event.
4. What is the 'power of delayed gratification' in a career?
The power of delayed gratification is the ability to resist the temptation of an immediate, smaller reward in order to receive a larger or more enduring reward later. In a career, this means pushing through periods of struggle, low pay, or lack of recognition with the understanding that this foundational work is necessary for long-term achievement.
References
psychologytoday.com — What Is Resilience? - Psychology Today
instagram.com — Brandon Sklenar Instagram Post (Reference to Early Career)